[00:00.46]Somewhere on a show I heard[00:04.62]That a picture tells a thousand words[00:10.06]So telly, if you bothered to take a look[00:13.59]Is the equivalent, of like, lots of books![00:18.53]All I know I learned from telly[00:20.78]This big beautiful box of facts[00:23.19]If you know a thing already[00:25.30]Baby you can switch the channel over just like that[00:27.75]Endless joy and endless laughter[00:29.94]Folks living happily ever after[00:32.17]All you need to make you wise[00:34.82]Is 23 minutes plus advertisements[00:36.82]Why would we waste our energy?[00:38.74]Turning the pages 1, 2, 3,[00:40.88]When we can sit comfortably[00:42.32]On our lovely bumferlies,[00:43.36]Watching people singing and talking and doing stuff?![00:45.70]All I know I learned from telly.[00:47.64]The bigger the telly, the smarter the man![00:49.70]You can tell from my big telly,[00:52.07]Just what a clever fella I am![00:54.28]Take it away, son.[00:56.65](guitar noise)[01:01.74]You can't learn that from a stupid book.[01:03.39]All I know I learned from telly -[01:05.56]What to think and what to buy.[01:07.79]I was pretty smart already,[01:09.96]But now I'm really, really smart - very very smart.[01:12.43]Endless content, endless channels[01:14.37]Endless chat on endless panels[01:16.93]All you need to fill your muffin[01:19.03]Without having to really think or nothing![01:21.15]Why would we waste our energy[01:23.21]Trying to work out Ulysses[01:25.34]When we can sit happily[01:26.89]On our lovely bapperlies[01:27.96]Watching slightly famous people[01:29.21]Talking to really famous people?[01:30.18]All I know I learned from telly[01:32.37]The bigger the telly, the smarter the man![01:34.57]You can tell from my big telly[01:37.15]Just what a clever fella I am![01:39.32][01:40.40]Who the dickens is Charles Dickens?[01:42.37]Mary Shelly? Gosh, she sounds smelly[01:44.79]Harry Potter? What a rotter[01:46.97]Jane Austen in the compost bin[01:49.85]James Joyce doesn't sound nice[01:51.67]Ian McEwen? Ugh, I feel like spewin'[01:53.82]William Shakespeare? Swilliam Shmakespeare...[01:56.22]Moby Dick – easy Grandma![01:58.06]All together now![02:00.50]All I know I learned from telly.[02:05.62]The bigger the telly, the smarter the man![02:11.28]You can tell from my big telly,[02:16.62]What a very clever fella I am![02:32.62]Thank you very much!